Priceless Happiness! ♥

Today, I woke up with a very-not-so-happy-heart. Yes, I admit my paranoid mind touches my jealous heart these past days. Which I rarely felt in-spite of my me-myself-and-I attitude (human nature).

But later this afternoon, I felt an ease and joy that I wished to feel everyday but life is a constant change indeed and deal with it!

I would be hypocrite if I say not even half of my happiness was not a product of him. No! Because I would absolutely say, he is one of my priceless happiness everyday. He was like my daily supplement of happy vitamins.

I’m not saying this because I was in the state of love but with all honesty? I’m saying this because this is the reality within me. Every second, minute, hours, days that I am with him was like a renewal of self. A ray of hope and faith.

The way we discuss things out of our feelings teaches me to be open minded which I am struggling with because I was not perhaps. I always put myself into one dimension that I found myself suffocated on my own little bubble. When we discuss such issues (especially on me), he never embarks or never put into consideration that I am her special someone and so he have to take my side on this. No! If he knew I was faced with controversial issues primarily on my group, he guides me always. He’s my compass to come up with a proper decision making.

It hurts on my part though when he says ‘May ka-away ka? Sinu na naman ka-away mo?’, really it hurts because he was like accusing me that I am a trouble-maker. But he taught me to be open-minded and he knows I’m not. Though he admits that I am ‘maldita’. It goes to show that I am not perfect, just a vulnerable human being but he sees me almost close to perfection.

The priceless happiness there? When my family finally sees his good heart. Papa said when we are having a worship, Amer was right daw. Every human has its shadow but that shadow can only be moved by you. I was even touched on how my mom treats Amer now. Yes, my mom and I has been to a tug-of-war situation because of our relationship (Amer). During those times, my heart was coated with anger and grudges, not knowing the real feelings of Amer during those times. I even cried in-front of him about it, begging him to say what he felt but the only thing he said? ‘Masyado mo kasing dinidibdib ang lahat ng bagay, magiging ok din to at okay lang ako. Ikaw lang ang iniisip ko..’

God it breaks my heart! But he was right, we just let things fall to its proper places and here we are now. We have a healthy relationship with our parents and both parties! I know Amer is not so good in comprehending my skills such as this but his understanding to the reality around him makes me say ‘I wish half of his thinking can be inherited by me..’, if not let our kids be! :)

T’was really made my day filled with a priceless happiness. Thank you Lord for sharing him on me. We just owe everything to you to where we are now.

Before we bid goodnight to each other, I was so touched the moment that he hugged me and say.. I miss you! I don’t know why it just made me feel so special or I guess I’ve waited for these past days for him to say it.